Shower- Should I do it myself?

I live in a city where I did not grow up and my nearest female relative (MIL) is 3 hrs away. I really don't have a female bff here, while I do have alot of girlfriends and coworkers.

My question: If no one has and no one does offer to throw me a shower, is it PC to throw my own?

This is our first baby and I would really like the memories associated with a baby shower. Its just that without a person throwing it on my behalf I don't know what in the heck to do. How do I coordinate games? Should there be games? What do you do at a baby shower? Does anyone have any ideas for a "do it yourself" baby shower?

I talked to Dh about it and his biggest concern is that we don't have enough space to host it at our house. We only have 1300 square ft, two rooms of which are storing baby room stuff and becoming a baby room. Where could I inexpensively have a shower without it being at my house?

Any help is much appreciated

I do understand your situation. I am also far from all my really good friends. My mom lives close but she is moving out of state before Christmas. I really do wonder is it PC to throw yourself a baby shower.

As far as games I am sure you can look those up on the web. A place try a park (I am not sure what the weather is like where you are), some parks rent spaces. Or you can even try a cafeteria type place like Piccadilly or golden corral; I know they rent out the back rooms.

I am starting to think I should throw my own shower too! Good Luck!

I hear ya. I had to ask my mom if she would do it. My advice would be to have it maybe at a restaurant that has several rooms. If the group is large enough, they'll probably just give you the room without charging you for it.

The shower I threw had a few games and also consisted of everyone drawing a number and making a birthday card for that year for the baby. It's completely up to you.

i dont think there is anything wrong with throwing your own...or you plan it but pretend DH is throwing it for you. As far as places if you belong to a church or know someone who belongs to a church sometimes they have rooms, or if its a church with a school they let you use the cafatieria....Or a VFW is pretty inexpensive.

For games at my first we did Baby gift bingo...everyone gets a blank bingo card which DH printed up himself and everyone writes in what they think you will get...whoever gets BINGO first wins...we gave out scratch offs, bottle of wine, flowers...It keeps the guess busy while you open gifts and kids can play too!

Wow that bingo is a great idea! It always seemed kind of boring for the poor guests to just sit there while all the gifts were being opened!

I don't think it is wrong if you throw your own especially that this is your first... people should understand that there is a lot that is needed and hopefully someone will feel guilty and help you out!!

As far as places, my sister and sil are throwing my shower and we will be having it at a church that my other sil goes too and it is FREE to have it there. Also, some other ideas of places are restraunts (everyone buys their own food so it saves you money) and if you know of anyone that has a mobile home or something like that most of those places have a club house... also if someone you know lives where there is an association they usually have a club house that you can rent and typically around $50 or so. I don't recommend a park only because it will probably be cold and also they are usually very expensive.

Games... this is the fun part. There is a game that is very useful. You buy baby items which you will have to buy anyway (ex. pacifier, paci clip, nail clippers, socks, teething tablets, etc.) You want to get between 13-15 items and place each item in a seperate brown paper bag and staple shut. Each guest will pass around the bags and write down what they think is in each bag. You will start off opening your presents with this game or you can open a different bag throughout your gifts so it keeps your guests attention the whole time. The one who guesses the most right wins! That is one of our favorite games to play.

Another game is you take different candybars (I think we did 10 different ones) and melt and much each one in a seperate diaper (buy the cheap diapers for this). Have them out on a table where your guests can go up and write down their guesses and again the one who gets the most right wins!! It is fun and supposed to look like baby poop!

I have a lot more games that I can write on here but I don't want it to be too much and cause confusion so if you would like more just let me know! I have thrown a shower for each of my friends when they have their first... but most of the time I get help!

Good luck and we will all be here for you to walk you through all of the steps.

I just found this web site http://www.babyshower101.com/baby_shower_etiquette.html and they have a whole etiquette section in case anyone is interested. There is alot of other stuff on this site too.

Cheirogloss wrote:I live in a city where I did not grow up and my nearest female relative (MIL) is 3 hrs away.

I dont think its pc at all to throw ur own shower. Its a shower for ur baby not u, its not like ppl are getting stuff for YOU to use u know? But if ure feeling weird about it, why not ask DH to talk to his mom and say something like SHE ASKED ME NOT TO SAY ANYTHING BUT NO ONE IS THROWING HER A SHOWER, WOULD YOU MIND COMING FOR A WEEKEND AND THROWING HER ONE and see if maybe she wouldnt mind throwing it for u where u live? 3 hours is a whiles away but i dont see why she wouldnt want to come for a weekend and throw u a shower? I had to ask a friend to do it because i went through some stuff with a girl i thought was my bff (long story) and i didnt think anyone would offer, so i asked one of my girlfriends if she wouldnt mind helping me throw one and she just said that shes not gonna help me but she will do it all herself which is nice.

i dont think alot of ppl like the idea of you thorwing your own shower. i will say that mymom thru my shower. but i did most of the work. i maded invites, sent them (they had her nams and rsvp on them), piced the theme, make the favors. etc. maybe you can plan the shower and put your MIL name on it. tell ppl she is throwing it up lives far so you are going most of the leg work. i invited about 48 ppl but only 18 showed eve tho 26 rsvped. my moom bought the food and cake.

we played celebraitry baby names, and the game where they guess how many t-pee squares will fit around your tummy.

good luck i hope you get a shower

I think its up to you, but since you asked, I will share my opinion, however I will start off my saying I try and follow etiquette, I even read what Miss Emily Post has to say about most things, and throwing your own shower isn't very "proper". They even go as far as to say that family members shouldn't throw showers either, because guests will be made to feel like the family is throwing a shower so people will buy gifts for their daughter, etc. I don't know if I would go that far, my Mom chipped in on my DD's shower, with her best friend and my two friends, but she was clearly very involved.

But I understand where you are coming from, you have to do what is best for you...the other thing is, sometimes work friends will do something for you as a surprise, that is what always happens at my office, you never know they are going to do something and then SURPRISE there they are...and sometimes they just contribute to a fund and buy one big gift card or one big present, it all depends.

Good luck

If it were me, I would throw myself a coed baby shower. That way you can invite a few couples you might hang out with. That way it is more of a "get together" rather than a formal shower. We did that for our first and it was a blast. We got to hang out with friends and get gifts at the same time! Our friends who had already had children brought them along and it gave us a chance to see what it was like with some little ones running around the house. You have to do something, so why not host your own party.

I think the couple idea is PERFECT...great idea Shannon!

I am in the same boat. No one has offered. My family is doing one for me in ATL but I know it will be a terrible outcome and no one will show. I really want one here with my friends but no one has offered. I was thinking about just throwing some hits and seeing where it goes. I haven't had a baby in 9 years so I assumed it would be okay to have another baby shower.

Blessed, after 9 years it certainly is acceptable to have another baby shower. Who would even assume that you'd hold onto baby gear & clothes for that long? I hope your friends and/or coworkers are secretly plotting a surprise one for you.

Karen wrote:Blessed, after 9 years it certainly is acceptable to have another baby shower. Who would even assume that you'd hold onto baby gear & clothes for that long? I hope your friends and/or coworkers are secretly plotting a surprise one for you.

Yea me too. If they are they are keeping it a great secret. But I love secrets so I hope so. Baby showers are so much fun and I really want to have one.