Problems with step son

3 days ago my step sons sister was born to his mom. Well it seems ever since then he has developed a really bad attitude(sometimes towards us) and is being really mean to my son/his brother. DH stops him and trys to correct his behavior but it doesnt seem to be working at all. Has anyone had to deal with this? Im wondering if he mite just stop in a few days when the newness of the situation wears off. Im also kind of worried how he will react to this baby in a few months if hes acting like this with his sister.

I have 2 step children that live with us since they were 3. My dss is 16 1/2 and dsd is 15.

How old is he?

Hes 4...

I would try spending extra time with him. Take him to the library and get books about new babies in the house. Take out some nice spider or dinosuar books. Or whatever he is interested in. Then take him to a nice playground. Talk to him while your out. Make his feelings count. You can also take him to toys r us and let him pick out a small toy for the new baby and something small for himself. Make him feel like a big boy who is caring and thinking about someone else. He is only 4 but little things like that might matter. If he is not living with you he might be feeling left out with the new baby. His mom probably spent a couple days in the hospital and lots of time with new baby. its a big adjustment for the other siblings. Some take it better then others. I have 7 kids with one on the way. The only child i expect to give me problems is the baby. Grayson is 18mths now but will be 23 mths then. He is still very needy.

Maybe someone else has some ideas.

April

Hes more along the lines of "shes my sister not yours". His mom had him at the hospital the entire time....shes the type to have her kids rite there for everything. I know he feels its special and hes proud but I dont know how to get him to understand that he can share the moment.

A 4yr old is developing lots of independance right now. They are on the bend of sharing when its convienent and keeping things to themselves other times. I had a friend ask me why her 2.5 yr old wont share... easy.. he hasnt developed that yet. Its normal. Just be there for him. It is his baby. Give him time.. eventually the baby will be bigger and annoying. This stage wont last forever.

That last line made me giggle. Thanks I havent been around a 4 year old since I was 12 so I forgot how they can be. I gave him some stuffed animals to give to baby and he seemed a little happier after. I guess I will have to wate and see how he is next week,hopefully hes a little better about the situation.

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There is my 4 yr old... the little blonde in the front

Your family is so adorable. I cant wate to get a picture of all the kids once this LO is born!

I have two step kids who live with us fill time. They are 14 and 11. They are terrible for me. I have been in the picture for over 3 years now. I just think at some point it is too late to change kids. I just feel like they are too old to correct. They are punished for what they do but they just continue to do it.

My advantage is that i have had my two step kids since they were both 3. I had to tell them when they were around 10ish that i wasnt their real mom. They call me mom. Their bio mom has no contact or rights. Its just us. They are now 16 and 15. Fun ages!

I think if I had my step kids from when they were younger that everything would be different. They are very difficult children and it is hard for me to love them like I love my daughter. I think my husband's kids resent me because I am there and there mom isn't. There mom lives in the same town with us and chooses to have no contact with her kids. I can't even imagine.

oh wow, i can see how they would feel a lot of pain and rejection in those circumstances, and make life difficult as a way of expressing themselves. i feel for you, and for them!!