Need Sleep advice

Evie wont sleep unless she is being held. If i put her down- she cries and cries to the point she gags. I feel like some of this is happening because we were unable to hold her for the first week of her life..so maybe we indulged her when we got home too much. People have told us you cant spoil her until she is 3 months old...and I hate letting her cry it out- but I cant hold her all night anymore. I fell out of the rocking chair. This isnt just a sharing the bed thing...I literally have to be sitting up holding her to make her calm down. When I hold her she stops crying immediately and falls right to sleep. I know its not safe for me to be holding her all night- I just dont know what to do. I am at the end of my rope- and I will try anything if anyone has any suggestions.

I am so sorry! You must be so tired. I remember feeling the same way with my son. He was a "hold me" baby for about a year. I could not get a break. He would not even go to my husband. I remember my breaking point and actually yelling at him when he was only a month old. It was so out of character for me. I was so sleep deprived I could not think straight. I agree that it is too early to let her cry it out. I am sure that you have already tried everything but she just wants you to hold her. Hopefully she will learn to soothe herself. Is she taking a pacifier? Or maybe have her sleep on you in a sling? I don't know a safe alternative, but you definitely have to get some sleep!

Oh, I can't give u any advice but to hold her.... I would,. I don't know how anyone can let a little one - that little cry and cry... I mean if u absolutely have to because ur going to the bathroom... exhausted ect.... then I can see.
I know it can be very frustating and overwelming also, but maybe try to let her have small sessions to lay byherself and get used to it a little bit.

Sylvi was like that to an extent. but my dr. said it was colic. She cried and cried and cried for 9 weeks straight.....sometimes for 12 hours at a time. So trust me, I know your pain. My dr. told me the same thing you've been told- you can't spoil a newborn by holding it and it's also not good to let them "cry it out" at this age. But you have to take care of you in order to be a good mommy for her. First I'd definitely say call your pediatrician and tell them exactly what she's doing and see if they have any suggestions. Sylvi's whole ordeal turned out to be a protein sensitivity and I had to put her on hypoallergenic formula and it made a world of difference. But I think you're saying she's crying because you put her down and she wants her mommy. Maybe you could try (which I'm sure you already are) handing her off to other people as much as possible when they're around so that she's still being held but she's getting used to other people. Also keeping her swaddled really tight seems to help and if you're laying her down somewhere, try to lay her in a wedge or something that snuggles close around her body as if she were being held. Someone had mentioned wearing a sling and I personally loved the baby b'journ w/ Sylv. I could strap it on and wear her around the house.

But listen, my best advice for you after going through this w/ Sylvi, is GET SOME SLEEP! I'm not suggesting just letting her lay there and cry but someone else may have to hold her and try to soothe her instead of you.....even if it doesn't seem to be working. She'll eventually stop and you know she's okay because someone is actually holding her. It'll be hard to do, but trust me....you need to do that for you!! Patton and I would switch off holding her every 2 hrs. Because 2 hrs. was about as much as either one of us could take...listening to her cry. But like I said before, in order to be the best mommy you can be, you need to take care of you first!! Talk to people and let them help and definitely give her dr. a call and see what they suggest. Sorry you're going through this girl. I know it's so super hard and stressful but take it one day at a time. It does eventually get better.

Karissa,

I agree with the others, its too early to let her cry it out, but you too need a break...the DH will have to step in and give her some cuddle time and you a few hours of sleep. Avery doesn't sleep well unless she is snuggled in tight, she has to be swaddled tight to sleep at night, and while she was in the NICU she was surrounded by this bumper thing that made her feel safe and secure, so she does better in her Papasan seat than she does in her open co-sleeper, she doesn't feel safe enough in there, so she doesn't sleep nearly as well as she does in her chair. Try and roll blankets up around her and secure her with rolled up blankets and towels, etc so she feels like something/someone is holding her tight...

Best of luck to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And the best advice I can give you, is the same I tell myself every night when I get 2 hours of sleep is like my man Darius Rucker says "It won't be like this for long".

I am completely sleep deprived. I seem to forget this time of babies when we get pg. Boy is it hard! I can barely get up in the am to get Shaiman off to school. I only took Logan to school 1 day out of the 3 i was obligated to. I just could not get up and get ready. During the day I beg for her to wake up, at night she decides to stay up. Somehow i have to flip that. She is awake from 3-6am. I have to get up for 7am. So whats the sense of going back to sleep? She sleeps better sleeping next to me. I have even been a bad mommy and put her on her belly to sleep while I am in the room. I just need to get some things done. It will get better.

SequoiaAutumn wrote:I am completely sleep deprived. I seem to forget this time of babies when we get pg. Boy is it hard! I can barely get up in the am to get Shaiman off to school. I only took Logan to school 1 day out of the 3 i was obligated to. I just could not get up and get ready. During the day I beg for her to wake up, at night she decides to stay up. Somehow i have to flip that. She is awake from 3-6am. I have to get up for 7am. So whats the sense of going back to sleep? She sleeps better sleeping next to me. I have even been a bad mommy and put her on her belly to sleep while I am in the room. I just need to get some things done. It will get better.

Don't feel bad April. I put mine on her belly when I am around too. She sleeps so much better!

Last night Avery and I fell asleep in bed, her asleep on her tummy on my chest, and we slept like that for almost 2.5 hours before I woke up. She sleep so well like that...the longest stretch we get is "maybe" 4 hours...and that isn't consistent, its between 2.5-3 hours usually...I wish I would have kept a sleep diary of Olivia because I have no idea what is normal at this age. I know Olivia slept through the night for the first time at 6 weeks, but all the books say a lot of babies still aren't sleeping through the night at 6 months, so I hate trying to read about what to expect.

Alyssa slept in her swing for the first few days at home. It is a papasan type swing...maybe try that? Good luck. I know it is tough!

I'm here for the roll call of the 'sleep deprived new mommies" club! Sophia slept with me, like either on my chest or snuggled on my side for the first week, so now when I put her in her bed, she just doesn't sleep well. If I pick her up, she'll settle right down and go to sleep, so I know she just likes being close, but last night I didn't even climb into bed until 2am because every time she'd start to sleep, I'd put her in her bed and she'd wake up. It is too early to let them cry it out, hopefully your DH can at least walk a bit with her so you can get some sleep!! Just know you are not alone!!

Stacey