Mother In Law Rant

I was at my neice's birthday party talking to SIL's sister who is due any day now. We were talking about being pregnant, how she is ready for it to be over, etc. I mentioned that my doctor is inducing me on Feb. 24 and we were talking about that. My dear MIL starts ranting and raving about how "ridiculous" it is for me to be induced. According to her, nature should be allowed to take it's course and he should not make that decision! I am due March 4.....so I do not see the harm in going a week early. In my opinion, it is a blessing and I will gladly take it! The thing that really pissed me off though, is that she always pulls this when dh is not around to hear it. She did it in front of about 4 other people and that was RUDE....the fact that I wasn't even talking to her and she butted in IMO is rude! DH and I are on complete agreement over the agreement with the doctor. We LOVE the idea. What the hell??? When did she get MD behind her name and who died and made her God? Sorry....I had to rant. Anyone have an opinion on how to handle this next time? She does this all the time and I am so over it. I do not know if it is pregnant hormones or what, but I am seriously ready to smack the hell out of her!

I'm so sorry to hear she had to butt in like that, I think sometimes people just dont think things through before saying them. On a side note is your doctor inducing you for a medical reason, just because I didn't know they would if you just asked them to..

He is doing it because I had a long labor with my daughter 10 yrs ago and I also had a history of high blood pressure with her.

I would like to rant too.... My MIL is an absolutely lovely woman. My SIL and I are both due within a couple of days of each other. My MIL has gone to her house to help paint and get ready for the baby. She is so into my SIL and hasn't even come around or asked how I am doing. I know that it is her only daughter but I am married to her son and that makes this just as much her grandchild. She helps my SIL every day with watching her kids. I never ask her for anything except to spend some time with us. I feel so much better! Whew!

obx, after reading your description of why the doc is planning to induce, it clarified for me what i'd do if i were in your shoes...

i would get a copy of a description of preeclampsia and/or eclampsia from a book or website -- note, your MIL probably knows it as "toxemia" -- like WebMD or Mayo Clinic, with full description of worst case scenario (coma/death). i would highlight the key points and hand it to her and say something like, "i would appreciate it if you would read this... based on how my labor went with DC#1, my doctor is inducing to protect me and the baby from these problems. if you have further comments about my medical treatment after you read you can take it up with him/her."

that should shut her up and make her think twice before espousing her opinion on such matters going forward. you can use a loving tone or a snotty tone... your choice!!

cheers,
Amy

ps - i used this approach with my beloved mother... she was giving me crap about working out too much early in my pg, and i put a stack of 3 books on pregnancy and exercise in front of her and said, "read these, and then we will discuss it"

she didn't read them, and i didn't hear another peep out of her on the topic! except that once i got so fatigued and out of my good workout habits, she started saying, you should go work out!!

god bless her.

While I don't have a MIL story (mine is one that says she wont watch them till they are old enough to work on the ranch and mind!!), my Mom however has learned to watch what she says.

When we were having our first, she had an opinion about EVERYTHING. She didn't like one of our name choices, even though it was a prefectly good name (Quintin). She kept saying "like San Quintin?". After one too many comments I told her she had her chance to name her children and raise her children. If she didn't like how it all turned out she only had one person to blame and to stop trying to name/raise our children.

She did butt out for the most part. I still get an occasional thing, and if she is in the area (I live in MT while she lives in so cal) I let her try and see how it works. She now believes me that you cannot leave a child, no matter the age, in her bedroom alone-no matter how child proof she may think it is. Yes they can reach the ceiling.

As for your MIL, explain that it is a medically necessary thing, not something of convience for you. Yes, you would rather go the natural way (bodys own time), but it is much safer for you and baby to be induced. Personally, I would inform her that if she has any more public outbursts, to expect a loud answer in return. Don't take it and she'll stop dishing it.
Jen